I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
