"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
She's the barista slut.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
