when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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