bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Edward fifth and chaser hands
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
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