the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
