NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
