I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
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She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
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Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
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