Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
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Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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