i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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