You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
