4 words: hood of his car
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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