I think scott just propositioned me for sex
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
