i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
