That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
you never un-have a 4some
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
