He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
So much rum. So many feels.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
