their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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