Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
