Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
