So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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