Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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