I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
