The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
