So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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