we need to drink 2009 down the drain
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
