Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
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