Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
