it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
this is an emotional support booty call
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
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