he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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