he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
