plz talk dirty to me
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
