He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
