eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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