Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
