Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
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