i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
