In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
