Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
