Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
