Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
