My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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