we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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