I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
it's like iHOP with fire
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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