i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
