just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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