Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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