No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize