would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
