And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
