she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
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were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
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So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
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