She's JV to your varsity
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize